Intro: Every single advertisement for podcasts in 15 seconds, Stamps.com, audible, Legal Zoom, $ Shave Club
Closing Song - Notorious BIG Juicy mashup something 80's retro new age electro
- Fritz the Cat Nine Lives
- sitcom ideas
- Online dating
- Keanu Reeves man of Tai-Chi
- Results of piss Matt off contest
- Playing football is parents having sex
- Mitch can't beat Pokemon X Y getting old (1st of many callbacks)
- Chris Ott joke of shitty internet and being short.
Funny Stories and Quotes
- We're here we're queer."
- Matt "We're here we're queer."
- Mitch "We're here we're fags."
- Matt "THAT DOESN'T RHYME!"
- Alex "DAMN IT YOU RUIN EVERYTHING."
- Mr. Mitchell man. Mitchellin Man. Having sex, Mitch parents having sex.
- We have a show to do.
- Matt "Do we?"
- Alex "Someone is leaving."
- Matt "Good."
- PC Gamer Elitest and PC podcast.
- 2 Guys 2 Jobs, who a roommates and each one is each others boss at the other job.
- Matt "What a horrible state of life."
- Alex "Seth McFarlene and egoraptor for casting.
- Matt "Seth does that one voice, egoraptor does that one face."
- Matt "Do you know how popular that show would be?
- I disagree everyone ruined Game Grumps.
- I'm not going to wash my penis for a month and put it in your mouth Mitch.
- This show is too offensive, so we should stop listening.
- Fritz the Cat, a black guy composed the music so it's not racist.
- Watched the sequel Nine Lives on netflix and not the original
- One step closer to the edge, and I'm about to break. (Mitchback)
- Soylent Green is people.
- If you parent's name a kid fay guy from Smashmouth his future is already set.
- Kate "Hey Mouth family."
- Smashmouth is not a fighting band.
- I have a something tough to announce. A lot of shit has been going on.
- Kate "You're gay."
- Alex "This is serious I don't want you to get mad at me."
- Kate "We won't get mad if you're gay."
- Alex "But you might get Matt if I'm gay."
- Matt "We enjoy diversity on this podcast if you're straight."
- Mitch "White"
- Kate "Cynical."
- Alex Guys I got a Wii U.
- Matt "I'm the only one here not with a Wii U.
- Kate "That's it, get off the cast.
- Alex I didn't want to be like Maxi-B with the PS4 gaemboner!"
- You're among friends and we love you.
- Matt "No!"
- Kate "Brownies."
- Alex "That's racist."
- The last time we had a guest we talked about animal cocks when he left.
- Alex "No we talked about animal cocks when he was on."(CORRECT ALEX)
- Straight men are...
- Matt "The nations problem."
- Wh don't you go on craigslist and find a stranger to sodomize you Friday night?
- Why don't you suck my anus?
- Alex "Cause we're having fun."
- 4-H cookies are bad. Taste like farm and honest work.
- I have a 6th sense of Mitch jokes. I think of it and go nah.
- I like vaginas, chim chimney
- Matt "I love sweeping chim chim vaginas."
- Did you know the richest man is a Mexican?
- Alex "Did you know the most Mexican guy is an Israeli?
- The only reaso you know that song is its in an animu.
- I'm Matt Flabslapper Racist.
- Matt's sitcom idea
- All of the guys roommates are former ex-girlfriends. Both sad and hilarious. Like my life. It's kinda happening.
- (Mitch) Everything you do is bad.
- Don't go to bars, go outside. If you don't go to a bar, Don't online date Mitch you'll find bad stuff.
- Someone like me turning a girl down? That's gotta hurt.
- Usually Keanu Reeves plays a box.
- Mitch "I loved him in Metal Gear."
- They speak Mandarin so Chinekenese.
- Keanu moves pretty well for a rod in his ass.
- Kate "Take it from me, its not easy."
- Christ you are giving me a stomachache.
- It's sometime time, sometimes pizza, sometimes pizzatime. What the fuck?
- Stop going to make Chungus happen.
- There was too many white people and dialogue in The Last of Us 6/10
- PAGS Nintendo is better than the PC.
- Mitch looks and sound like Michael Cera and his life is just as depressing
- BroPan "contest" That made me mad.
- Actual fart*
- Alex "Goddamn it."
- You guys are making me gassy.
- Phil Spector the guy that made Deus Ex?
- Kate "Warren Spector."
- I'm leaving the show. I mean Tony left.
- I'm imagining you playing Mario Kart.
- Alex "While jerking off?
- Kate "catfood catfood."